Something wrong with my blog

I posted something but it didn't seemed to be publish. What's wrong man?? Why can't i see my post???

Just bored and blabbering shits

Well..... i'm dead bored, Stardom is coming, tired, stressed. Exams, cometh after Stardom. Hope to do well in this final piece of obstacle. Want to further my studies in Poly. Wish me luck cheers, good night.

*love has gone to a faraway land. Hope is not lost but then now is not the time for it to happen*

The puzzle is complete

Well....at last i've found out about the puzzling behaviour of the last Saturday. Hmmm......... no wonder the subtle body language amongst the both of them. Well... i am sad and hurt to find out about it. Yeah really am. But luckily i never pursued further in asking you out. Had i done that, i would have been hurt more. The reason that you gave me when i confessed to you about my feelings, you said you wanted to concentrate in your studies and the work, but alas, now it is different. One month with him. La tristessa durera.......... I'll just continue with my life, trying to forget you. All the praises that i had for you, now seems inappropriate. For the puzzle of your puzzling behaviour have complete. May you enjoy happiness with him.

Adieu

Getting sick again *sniff*

Hey there peeps. Well i'm getting sick again. Seems to me that i need to take care of my health. The signs are there. Well yesterday there was something interesting happened when i was at the Macdonald's at East Coast Parkway. There was this couple who were sitting behind me. At first all seems normal, they bought food. Then a few minutes later they started quarelling. Even to the point the guy raised his voice. After awhile the girl cried and left the place. The guy sat there for awhile and later left. And do you want to know what is the interesting part? They never took a bite at the food! Hahahahaha... my friend noticed it and told me about it. So i went over and brought the tray over to our table and gave the food to my other friends. For the couple that fought i have an advice for you. Eat first before you fight! But then it's a free meal for us......

*Why does my heart seems to beat for her?*

At last it is time to pass the baton......

Yes this is it. The SC investiture. At last. Time to pass the baton to the new batch of councillors. What a day today man. There was sort of an emotional atmosphere. Some were letting out tears, some were calm. Well for once i see the spirit of togetherness again. The speech by my President and also a friend, Sharulnizam, was indeed a touching speech. I felt like crying but i composed myself and tried to smile. Truly today was an occasion to be remembered. It seems like it was yesterday that we became Student Councillor. Well the event went quite smoothly. The dancing part with some of my fellow Councillors dressed up like girls. That got the crowd screaming and laughing. I think we have made an impact to the audience. They were all cheering. Thank you all. Thank you very much for the memories. Especially those that are close to me since the begining of the Journey to be the a Council member. And to those incoming Excutive Committee, i wish you all the best for your future projects. And to the rest of the members, stay together as one.

Well.... today was a great experience for me. I enjoyed myself.
Signing off......

*I saw you today, looking unexpectedly beautiful. You looked great today. Wish you all the best in your future endeavours*

A reminiscence of my past.......

Well... something happened while i was surfing the net just now. Was surfing anakmelayu.com just browsing through the profiles and seeing the pictures because i have nothing better to do. By the way i have an account but i never did subscribe to the services because i feel it is a waste of time. Then i don't know why suddenly i feel like looking up my ex-girlfriend on it. It type her full name but there wasn't any hit. Then i tried the name that her family called her. "Nani" that's the name. The name that brought me happiness but also brought me sorrows. When i entered that name, i got a hit. As i browse through the list i came across a sort of familiar face. I doubled click on it and guess what? IT IS HER! OMG..... i was like damn. You the girl that i loved soo much, the one that i adore, the one that i hoped for a future with. She have an account in anakmelayu.com. Oh well i've already moved on.

She was the only ex-girlfriend that i really loved soo much. The one that i sacrificed a lot of time for. I even skipped school just to meet her everyday. Those were the times. She brought me happiness but she also brought me sorrow. I gave her everything that she wanted, but i ended up gaining nothing. She broke up with me while i was on attachment at another camp, a month before my birthday, 6 months before my ORD date. That was in 2002. It took me nearly 2 yrs to forget her. It was hard. She was the only person i adore. She said the same things about me but i was blinded by my love and never see through her real intentions. While were together, she was two-timing me. I suspected it and confronted her but she kept on denying it. Sigh those were the times. Such bittersweet memories.

Now after that incident and a few short term relationship i finally erased her from my mind. Friends, relatives keep asking me, "Do you have a girlfriend" I looked at them and smiled and answered, "No i don't" Yes i'm not getting any younger but then i'm afraid to have another relationship. I'm afraid of the underlying consequences. I'm afraid of history repeating itself. And i also feel that i'm still not stable enough to have a relationship. But then sometimes things just happen for without a warning signal.
I fell in love with someone i least expected to. Someone which i never even took a second look before when she passed by me. Someone that i don't even think of falling in love with. But then i do not know why just can't tell her the truth face to face. I've only told her through MSN messenger chat. Why can't i just tell her? But last monday, i was talking to my friends at the bus-stop, then suddenly i was like letting out the tension by saying "I want so&so" Never did i realise that she was there sitting at the bus-stop. I guess she might have heard it. Oh well...... i've actually wanted to ask her out, just out as friends because i ain't expecting anything. But the courage to do so i have not. Why? I don't know. Other girls i'm not attracted to i can easily talked to them but when i like a particular someone it is just hard for me to talked to that person without feeling clammy. Well a friend told me do not wait too long for it to happen because if you wait too long she might be taken by someone else. I know it is true but how, tell me how can i gather enough courage to approach her and ask her out? Oh please someone tell me what should i do. I just need some help. I need something or someone who can boost my self-confidence. Please help me.......

Something Stupid

Well.... i did something stupid just now, and its unmentionable. Only 2 people knew about it. Damn!